Monday, July 31, 2017
Sunday, July 30, 2017
Lost in the Woods
A young man was lost wandering in a forest, when he came upon a small house.
He knocked on the door and was greeted by an ancient Chinese man with a long, grey beard. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?"
"Certainly," the Chinese man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese tortures known to man."
"Ok," said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty old as well, and entered the house.
Before dinner, the daughter came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful, and had a fantastic figure.
She was obviously attracted to the young man since she couldn't keep her eyes off him during the meal.
Remembering the old man's warning, he ignored her and went up to bed alone.
But during he night, he could bear it no longer, and sneaked into her room for a night of passion.
He was careful to keep everything quiet so the old man wouldn't hear. Near dawn he crept back to his room, exhausted, but happy.
He woke in the morning with the feel of pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes he saw a large rock on his chest with a note on it that read, "Chinese Torture 1: Large rock on chest."
"Well, that's pretty crappy," he thought. "If that's the best the old man can do then I don't have much to worry about."
He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out. As he did so he noticed another note on it that read: "Chinese Torture 2: Rock tied to left testicle."
In a panic he glanced down and saw the rope that was already getting close to the end.
Figuring that a few broken bones was better than castration, he jumped out of the window after the boulder.
As he plummeted downward he saw a large sign on the ground that read, "Chinese Torture 3: Right testicle tied to bedpost."
Oops!
He knocked on the door and was greeted by an ancient Chinese man with a long, grey beard. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?"
"Certainly," the Chinese man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese tortures known to man."
"Ok," said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty old as well, and entered the house.
Before dinner, the daughter came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful, and had a fantastic figure.
She was obviously attracted to the young man since she couldn't keep her eyes off him during the meal.
Remembering the old man's warning, he ignored her and went up to bed alone.
But during he night, he could bear it no longer, and sneaked into her room for a night of passion.
He was careful to keep everything quiet so the old man wouldn't hear. Near dawn he crept back to his room, exhausted, but happy.
He woke in the morning with the feel of pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes he saw a large rock on his chest with a note on it that read, "Chinese Torture 1: Large rock on chest."
"Well, that's pretty crappy," he thought. "If that's the best the old man can do then I don't have much to worry about."
He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out. As he did so he noticed another note on it that read: "Chinese Torture 2: Rock tied to left testicle."
In a panic he glanced down and saw the rope that was already getting close to the end.
Figuring that a few broken bones was better than castration, he jumped out of the window after the boulder.
As he plummeted downward he saw a large sign on the ground that read, "Chinese Torture 3: Right testicle tied to bedpost."
Oops!
Saturday, July 29, 2017
Friday, July 28, 2017
Thursday, July 27, 2017
Wednesday, July 26, 2017
The Negligee
A husband walks into Victoria's Secret to purchase a sheer negligee for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price'…the sheerer, the higher the price.
Naturally, he opts for the sheerest item, pays the $500, and takes it home.
He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.
Upstairs the wife thinks (she's no dummy), 'I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.'
She appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.
The husband says, 'Good Grief! You'd think for $500, they'd at least iron it!'
He never heard the shot.
Funeral on Thursday at Noon. Closed coffin.
Naturally, he opts for the sheerest item, pays the $500, and takes it home.
He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.
Upstairs the wife thinks (she's no dummy), 'I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.'
She appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.
The husband says, 'Good Grief! You'd think for $500, they'd at least iron it!'
He never heard the shot.
Funeral on Thursday at Noon. Closed coffin.
Tuesday, July 25, 2017
Monday, July 24, 2017
Cars and Travel Trailers
Those were the good old days when cars and travel trailers had distinctive looks.
1935 Pontiac with Turquoise Canned Ham
1936 Pierce Arrow with Travelodge
1947 Custom Buick Sedanet with Matching Trailer
1949 Studebaker Pickup with Purple Trailer to Match
1951 Hudson Commodore with matching Trailer
1955 Ford Customline Wagon with Shasta Trailer
1952 Buick Riviera Hardtop with Matching Trailer
1956 Ford Ranch Wagon with Teardrop Trailer
1959 Chevrolet Impala Hardtop with Shasta Travel Trailer
1959 Chevrolet El Camino with Shasta Travel Trailer
Pretty Pink Pair 1959 Cadillac Sixty with Shasta Trailer
1962 Ford Cortina with Custom Travel Trailer
Really love how the cars and travel trailers are color matched.
1935 Pontiac with Turquoise Canned Ham
1936 Pierce Arrow with Travelodge
1947 Custom Buick Sedanet with Matching Trailer
1949 Studebaker Pickup with Purple Trailer to Match
1951 Hudson Commodore with matching Trailer
1955 Ford Customline Wagon with Shasta Trailer
1952 Buick Riviera Hardtop with Matching Trailer
1956 Ford Ranch Wagon with Teardrop Trailer
1959 Chevrolet Impala Hardtop with Shasta Travel Trailer
1959 Chevrolet El Camino with Shasta Travel Trailer
Pretty Pink Pair 1959 Cadillac Sixty with Shasta Trailer
1962 Ford Cortina with Custom Travel Trailer
Really love how the cars and travel trailers are color matched.
Sunday, July 23, 2017
Saturday, July 22, 2017
Friday, July 21, 2017
Perfect Female Body
Ran across this article and thought this was very interesting…what do you think?
How the “Perfect” Female Body Has Changed In 100 Years
Throughout the 20th and 21st centuries, the mainstream idea of the “perfect body shape” for women has shifted almost as often as fashion trends. In some cases, the contrasts between decades are shocking, and speak volumes to public attitudes at the time – which, basically, depended on whether or not people thought it was okay for women to have curves.
Countless diets, pills, and celebrity icons later, we’re still going wrong in 2017 by encouraging women and girls to constantly compare themselves to others, rather than loving themselves in their own right. At the very least, however, we’ve come farther than using cigarettes and Wonder Bread to slim down.
Take a walk back in time with us, and marvel at the varyingly ridiculous expectations placed on women over the years.
More info: (h/t: Vintage Everyday, DM)
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Camille Clifford
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Jean Harlow
Image credits: unknown
Elizabeth Taylor
Image credits: unknown
Farrah Fawcett
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: unknown
How the “Perfect” Female Body Has Changed In 100 Years
Throughout the 20th and 21st centuries, the mainstream idea of the “perfect body shape” for women has shifted almost as often as fashion trends. In some cases, the contrasts between decades are shocking, and speak volumes to public attitudes at the time – which, basically, depended on whether or not people thought it was okay for women to have curves.
Countless diets, pills, and celebrity icons later, we’re still going wrong in 2017 by encouraging women and girls to constantly compare themselves to others, rather than loving themselves in their own right. At the very least, however, we’ve come farther than using cigarettes and Wonder Bread to slim down.
Take a walk back in time with us, and marvel at the varyingly ridiculous expectations placed on women over the years.
More info: (h/t: Vintage Everyday, DM)
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Camille Clifford
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Alice Joyce
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Jean Harlow
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Elizabeth Taylor
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Twiggy
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Farrah Fawcett
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Elle MacPherson
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Kate Moss Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Christina Aguilera
Image credits: unknown
Image credits: Leo Delauncey
Courtesy of boredpanda
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